The following is a work of fiction.

Not Nick Nolte's Diary, Malibu, California
July 5, 2005


The traffic coming into Malibu was terrible this afternoon. Thankfully I was watching all of this from behind the telescope and not the wheel of the Rover. The city was doing some yard work and had everything reduced to one lane. The city workers were hearing it from the cars as they drove by. I kept a tally of middle fingers and honkings. Apparently, the middle finger is still as popular as ever. No real bad news to report otherwise. I did snag my robe on the banister this morning; that's two torn robes this month. Perhaps I need to walk more slowly. In the process I spilled some of my carrot shake on the carpet. I ground it into the padding with my foot. I am sure Manolo will notice. Last time I did this it took him three days. Let's see if he can break the record. Take care.

[signed] Nick

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