The following is a work of fiction.

Not Nick Nolte's Diary, Malibu, California
February 3, 2005


Is there a shape as pleasing as the oval? I think not. It took three men to get the urinal in place, but it truly is a work of art. Manolo is calling it the cornicopia. It does have a horn-like shape. It's a Toto UT104V if you're scoring at home. It looks like something stolen from the set of 2001. It's a startling presense in the hallway loo. That reminds me, I have to get back to an origami lesson with my friend in Japan. He stays up all night and he faxes the patterns over. When he gets drunk, the origami gets easier, oddly. Origami by correspondence, I know, it sounds like a Steven Wright joke and perhaps it is. I will fold you a crane, Diary. Although just now it looks more like an insect.

[signed] Nick

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