The following is a work of fiction.

Not Nick Nolte's Diary, Malibu, California
December 24, 2004

Fools' errands

A full day of packing today. Terry is in town, staying at the Reg-Bev-Wil. Scotty and I picked him up last night in the new Rover and despite Scotty's masterful navigation we were late for our caroling group. We drove from Oak Hill to Malibu Vista but couldn't track them down. Terry entertained us with stories about Mike Medavoy and his ornithophobia. The way he tells a story, even the one about the sparrow in the trailer, the tension is palatable. Yes, that is not a typo, Diary. Next stop was some last minute Christmas shopping. For Scotty I got his usual gag gift: exploding racquetballs. I had no gift for Terry yet, so I gave him Manolo's. I hope he enjoys existential psychotherapy. We met up with the ladies in time to indulge the egg nog ice luge. Terry's date was a dreamboat, Diary. My eyes still burn from staring at those gams. Season's greetings.